Sunday, 19 April 2009

coke, mousse and snes

well well well, the old blogmeister...have'nt touched this thing in a month. i'd like to say ive had a writers block but i could have written so much in this thing i would have lost my fingers due to early arthritis.

interesting life i lead during redundancy, but the thing ill not miss is how much sleep i get to have. i love sleep, but for some reason i feeel more liek death in the morning when ive had more sleep than when ive had less. i can spend 12 hours head on pillow time (and i dont mean biting the pillow) and wake up feeling like ive just recovered from kemotherapy and a 6 month coma - but if i wake up after say 6 hours, i can bop out of bed, sing the cha cha slide and backflip all the way down the stairs no hassle!!!
im not entirely sure why and my mum was the same but does anyone get this aswell???....i cant eat when ive woken up?! it takes a couple of hours before i actually want anything, dont get me wrong im a BIG fan of cereal and tesco receipts would prove that but when i wake up, id rather not eat sod all as im just not physically hungry!

anyways as far as ramblings go i could carry the fuck on...but instead ill tell you what im doing at this exact moment:

im watching an irishman make an italian plumber float via what appears to be a badgers tail getting attacked by some round shiny things...can you guess what it is yet?

Thursday, 19 March 2009

Exhibit A

heres the pic of my toe at the time, skin is amazing its pretty much healed over now;

basically when i took this photo the blood was gushing fairly quickly so you cant see too much but yeah it was pretty painful...


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Tuesday, 17 March 2009

Slice n Dice

Well well well, bumlife has been just dandy...

I've managed to work on my music and its paying off, had my newest track played on bbc radio 1xtra last night.

On another note, i've done something rather horrific thats left me waddling worse than a dvda (double vaginal double anal) porn star...i smashed a glass in my room the other night whilst in a rush and there were some thick peices broken from it aswell as the classic tiny crumbs which i cleared up and put on the side...mistake...
i should have cleared them up, taken to the bin and problem solved but no; i decided to put it near to where i smashed it originally on the floor without thinking and the other day i had to grab my phone as it went off moving so fast that i knocked over the glass full of smashed peices, stepped on a rather thick peice and sliced open the underside of my toe (the one next to the big toe on my left foot)...

it didnt really hurt that much, it stung for like 10 seconds then went, kinda like paper cut but upon inspection have realised it ALOT worse...its like a page out of the nuts magazine "pictures for the stronger stomach".

the glass had actually sliced open my toe all the way left to right, and leaked all the small amount of fat inside and just bled to shit...i cleaned it up with the old cold wet tissue etc and took another look which made my eyes pop out my head...


i had could see the bone


(ill post up a picture as soon as i find my lead)

Monday, 9 March 2009

All gone downhill

what a fandabbydozey day ive had...

been doing a temp job cleaning a care home for old people..now anyone in this line of work knows how harsh that can be, as it involves alot of poo, wee and sometimes puke. i thought i was going to puke.

last week i had a cushty job, the next im cleaning shit off a wall in marigolds, how depressing.

on a lighter but darker note i got told someone killed themself coz they were bored

Thursday, 5 March 2009

Random Comedy

im a big fan of random comedy myself and i bought something recently that made me smile very much since having the vhs's of them from back in the 90's.
the smell of reeves and mortimer, highly simple comedy but fucking brilliant, nothing like it about. the simple jokes they do at the table at the start of the program is pure genius, stupid random crap jokes but for some reason theyre hilarious.

"hey vic can you smell onions?"
"no"
"what, even if their really close up?"

they also include a couple of jordy men that roam around wearing bras and getting offended about it when no1 really mentions it whatsoever...genius

also a big fan of ross noble at the moment, if youve not heard of him i suggest to do some research. hes a freestyle comedian who is TOTALLY random and hilarious...and i really want to go see him with someone i know called gemma if theres enough tickets. watch the whole video below, its about glueing meat to your face to get rid of a sexually active vegan who says to him "want some hot lental lovin?!" and at the start if this vid the vegan has just left so hes trying to go "phew, got out of that one"...watch how it pans out....GENIUS

Bum Life

well, the inevitable happened...i got made redundant yesterday and as much as i sometimes hated going into work, i would have love to have kept my job, but i paid the price for the current crisis and now living a bum life.

so...im laying in bed at 14:33 eating fox's 'chunky' triple chocolate biscuit watching some program where a posh twat is taking a group of randomers up a mountain. its a strange thing to watch but it has thrown a realisation into what chris moyles and that are doing for comic relief. theres so many things that can dent someone as they go up these great heights like altitude sickness, torn muscles etc...its pretty brutal

whilst watching and writing this the guy has just said "theres a big chance of hallucination as an effect of the altitude sickness...for instance...this black guy behind me has just imagined hes walked past a pizza takeaway"

firstly..."this black guy" is a terrible thing to say considering hes been walking with this group for 4 days so you would have thought hed say his name and secondly, a pizza takeaway? i didnt realise dominoes were so determined

Friday, 27 February 2009

Irish Wrath Strikes Coldplay and Radio 1

I think i can possibly die happy now...

I was listening to joe wiley on radio 1 earlier, i dont usually though as i listen to chris moyles then get off and crack on to some drum n bass at 10am - but needless to say im very pleased i waited this one out.
She had U2 in the 'live lounge' and all was gravy; then she started to interview them, edge was polite and so were the others and then joe said "oh look, heres the singer...apparently walking on the tables to get to me" which i thought was a good start. Then she started off with one question, very simple question but came to be the best answer EVER said as a reply on any massive radio station in the universe.

the question was:

Joe: "Now, i hear you (bono) say that chris martin from coldplay could be up there with the likes of Paul McCartney, is that true?"

Bono: "Yes very much so, hes a great harmonist and a great guy...








...he's also a wanker"